COLONOSCOPY HUMOR

This list has been going around for a while: alleged actual comments made by patients (predominately male) about to undergo (or immediately after) colonoscopies:

1. "Take it easy Doc, you're boldly going where no man has gone before!"

2. "Find the missing Malaysian airliner in there?"

3. "Can you hear me NOW?"

4. "Oh boy! That was sphincterrific!"

5. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"

6. "You know in Arkansas we're now legally married."

7. "Any sign of Amelia Earhart, Doc?"

8. "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out..."

9. "Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!"

10. "If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!"

11. "Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."

12. "You used to be an executive at Enron didn't you?" 



13. "This reminds me of my last IRS audit!" 

And the best one of them all...

14. "Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is in fact not up there?"